Srijan+Mood

=//__ The Real Shrek __//=

chapter one
Shrek, the famous ogre known for saving Princess Fiona, was loved by all. But that is only what was thought. If you want the truth, read this book. But if you believe what you know, drop the copy of this book and bur n it. For those who want to know the truth, read on. I will reveal Shrek’s scandal to you. So read on and learn the truth of what happened.

It was a sunny day and Shrek was outside with his knife and hammer making and posting a sign that said “BEWARE OF THE OGRE”. He turned around and saw a few soldiers coming his was in an orderly fashion.

“Perfect” he thought, and he pulled a secret lever and the soldiers behind the leader were pulled up by their legs into the trees, dropping their armor.

The leader of the army spoke. “We have come to take you to another land as order of king Maximum the third and as all of the other fairytale creatures.”

“You and what army?” Shrek taunted him. The leader slowly turned around. As he did Shrek produced his knife and put it through the man’s back. He twisted it and brought out chunks of the soldiers back and blood oozed out grotesquely. The bloodcurdling screams were unbearable. Shrek chuckled as he realized the man was dieing slowly. Shrek brought down the knife again and as the man’s screams died, Shrek put In chunks of the dead man’s meat raw into his mouth and ate them. He sighed happily as he thought about eating the rest of the army for dinner. He would rip their limbs apart and feast on their hearts and liver. He laughed as he thought about the bile in the liver. It was so sweet.

Then out of nowhere an an​oyying voice that had a strange ring to it said," Man, you're one mean green fighting machine"

Shrek jumped and saw no one standing there. Then he heard strange breathing coming from in front of him. It definitley wasn't human. There was no chance it was.

chapter 2
Shrek slowly turned around. Once again there was no one there. Then Shrek realized he was being stalked.Shrek grunted. It was probably just donkey. Donkey was his succesful assasinator who had killed many people and brought them to be Shreks dinner. He also appeared out of nowhere and started shooting at things. But just then, a man with a spear and sheild leaped out. Shrek just stood there. Then they started to wrestle and fight. Shrek knocked the mans spear away and they continued in hand to hand combat. then shrek screamed, Oh forget this. Then he brought out a .44 magnum and shot the man. He ate the man raw and swallowed the fresh bones whole. He only left skin.

Once he got home he hollered,''Donkey I caught a whole gang of people. You dont need to catch any people for dinner.'' he heard no reply, olny the dead silence of the house. What happened to donkey?

Shrek went into donkeys room. It was empty, and there was no one there. No one except the limp lifeless body of donkey. covered in blood, and eyes shut. Shrek neared him and saluted to the brave creature who had once saved the life of Shrek. suddenly, Donkey jumped up and screamed. Shrek fainted when he saw donkeys face. His brain was showing, one of his eyeballs were ripped, his teeth and mouth were ripped and messed up, and his face was scarred and stitched in many palces. what a nice look shrek thought. I wish it were more realistic next time.

Surprise! donkey yelled. Why dont you make it look real this time? shrek questioned. He was tired of Donkey's little disguises that were so obviously fake. So he admitted he was a little scared, but not of the costume. It was what was behind donkey. A small man with brutal features and a weather beaten face with a knife was hanging from the wall.